My Three Sons

December 22, 2011 at 5:00pm By: Mr. Wilson Posted in The Lincolnite Blog

We finalized our adoption this morning. It’s finally time to take the masks off the two boys who’ve been living with us for the past 18 months.

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Soon I will have photos from the courthouse. Unfortunately I wasn’t smart enough to have somebody take photos with my camera so I’m stuck waiting for others to send me their photos. Mr. and Mrs. T were kind enough to go to the courthouse this morning to take candid photos for us. I can’t wait to see them! Until then, I would like to introduce you to Joseph Charles Wilson [center] and Keishor Murray Wilson [left], along with their proud brother, Robbie:

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And here they are with their cousins Morgan (far left) and Sam (far right):

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Joey is 9 years old and is in third grade. Joey loves Lego, video games, and playing with his friends. Joey is a blue belt in taekwondo at Tiger Rock Academy. He would eat carbs and cheese for every meal if we allowed him to.

Joey first entered the child welfare system almost exactly five years ago. Joey’s shockingly lengthy tenure in the system is a stinging indictment of both the old, State-run system and the new, privatized system. He doesn’t necessarily know it, but he has suffered due to several failures in the system over the years—not to mention the issues that landed him in the system in the first place. Joey is a boisterous, bouncy, happy boy, but he also faces several behavioral health challenges that have kept The Missus and me busy. Most of all Joey needs consistency. He gets that here.

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Keishor (key-SHORE) is 4 years old. The Missus is doing preschool with him at home and he’s one smart cookie. Keishor also does taekwondo at Tiger Rock. Keishor loves to mimic me by helping with chores around the house, playing referee, and even getting his hair buzzed off so he’d look more like me. As you can see from the photo above, Keishor and Robbie have bonded extremely well.

Keishor has never known life outside of the child welfare system. When he first arrived he was quiet and reserved, and he mostly deferred to Joey, the one and only constant in his life. After a few months he began to emerge and find his own identity. These days Keishor is talkative, playful, and just the right amount of ornery. Keishor has a little confusion about the role various people play in his life—and who can blame him!—but it’s clear that overall his age and other factors spared him from the harm his brother experienced.

The Missus and I are extremely pleased to have wrapped up this chapter of our lives. We first began inquiring about foster parenting two years ago. In the months since then, we’ve experienced things we never could have foreseen. As I’ve mentioned before, I will some day tell many of those stories in one format or another. Some of the stories are deeply personal and I need to tell them for therapeutic reasons. Others are important to share so folks have a better understanding of what foster care is all about. There are rewards and there are costs. I will tell about both.

I would be negligent if I didn’t remind you that Joey and Keishor are just two boys. There are many, many more foster children out there. Their ages and circumstances vary, but the one thing they all share is an urgent need for caring homes to welcome them. Perhaps for a night, a week, a month, a year, or even a lifetime. They need you.

Can’t offer your home? No problem. You can support foster children through any of a variety of charities. One of my personal favorites is Foster Care Closet, which provides clothes and other items to foster children of all ages.

Not up for either of those options? Still no problem. You can get involved. You can become a Court Appointed Special Advocate or perhaps join the Foster Care Review Board.

No time? Still no problem. You can do a world of good by paying attention to child welfare issues, and by speaking up and speaking out. Does the treatment of foster kids (or foster parents, or even bio parents) piss you off? Then tell somebody! Tell your friends, your family, your neighbors. And tell your representatives, whether at the state or national level. One of the biggest problems with child welfare reform is that few people know much about it, and for most people it’s a very abstract, foreign concept. The more that people talk about it, the more folks will realize how many people around each and every one of us are affected by it.

Thank you to all of you who have supported us and wished us well. Be sure to say hi if you see us around town. We’re hard to miss, this Wilson party of five.

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The Comments

Kimberly December 22, 2011 at 7:11pm

What a great looking family! I am so, so very happy for all of you!

Mary December 22, 2011 at 7:11pm

Aw! Congratulations! We adopted our daughter after nearly three years of foster care.  What a wonderful milestone for your family.

lisa December 22, 2011 at 10:08pm

Congratulations! What a beautiful family!

Gene December 23, 2011 at 2:42pm

Congratulations!

the_feez December 23, 2011 at 3:28pm

Congrats to you and your family. Thank you for being a good person.

Dave K December 23, 2011 at 3:55pm

Congratulations!  Your devotion to these kids is inspiring.

Fletch December 23, 2011 at 4:42pm

Congrats to the whole family!

beerorkid December 24, 2011 at 6:16pm

So awesome.  It fills me with joy knowing that part of your journey is done and the rest can go forward.

Nikkidemas December 25, 2011 at 5:59am

So glad to finally put faces to these kiddos you’ve been talking about!  Congratulations again.  What a great Christmas gift for your family!

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