Lincolnites, M.D.
It’s the second half of January, and that means it’s time for me to get sick! Woohoo! This is becoming an annual tradition.
This year’s symptoms include:
- Intestinal discomfort. Started yesterday morning, got worse overnight.
- Muscle aches. Started overnight and this morning.
- Fatigue, though that could just as well be because I didn’t sleep last night.
- Light fever, sitting at 100-101, depending on which ear you ask. Noticed it about an hour ago.
- Chills, presumably because of the fever and the fact that my basement is frickin’ freezing.
- Added at 1:00pm: Headache, which was there when I woke up from a nap.
So far I would classify this illness as a 3 or 4 on a scale of 0-10 (zero being healthy, 10 being “praying for death"). I have a pretty high tolerance for discomfort, so many people would probably bump that up a notch or two. For comparison, 7 is probably where I start to think about going to the doctor, and I would say the worst I’ve ever felt was an 8, which I hit twice. Once was when I went to the hospital with for heat stroke. The other time was a few years back when I was hit simultaneously by flu, strep throat, bi-lateral ear infections, and bi-lateral conjunctivitis. That was a crappy week.
So what do you think, Lincolnites, M.D.? What’s wrong with me? Did you give it to me? Obscure, exotic diagnoses welcome!
The Comments
Nikkidemas says Get well January 22, 2009 at 11:04am
There’s not a lot of flu going around. Still, if you haven’t seen it, it’s worth checking out Google’s flu tracker.
Gene says I hear exposure to breasts January 22, 2009 at 11:24am
I hear exposure to breasts makes some people feel unwell…
Fletch says RE: I hear exposure to breasts January 22, 2009 at 11:30am
I think exposure to breasts is a cure, not a disease. In fact, I encourage it.
Fletch says According to the TV commercial, January 22, 2009 at 11:29am
According to the TV commercial, I think it’s a snakebite.
Peter says Sounds like the Plague. January 22, 2009 at 11:30am
Sounds like the Plague. What part of town do you live in?
Nikkidemas says The Black Death January 22, 2009 at 11:41am
Have you visited Algeria recently? It could be the Black Death.
matt ollberding says Eat any peanut butter products? January 22, 2009 at 11:45am
Cause your symptoms sound a lot like those of salmonella. Fever and intestinal discomfort are two of the symptoms. You didn’t clarify “intestinal discomfort” but if it’s more than just indigestion, coupled with a fever, would be indicative of some kind of stomach bug.
matt olberding says RE: Eat any peanut butter products? January 22, 2009 at 11:46am
You know it’s a bad day when you can’t spell your own name.
Mr. Wilson says RE: Eat any peanut butter products? January 22, 2009 at 12:09pm
I eat peanut butter almost every day so yeah, it could be that. Thing is, though, I can’t recall a time in at least the past week that I ate anything other than Skippy. So far the outbreak has not been associated with major consumer brands of peanut butter.
If there is Evil PB lurking in our house, Robbie and The Missus have ingested it, too.
Regardless, I would rather suffer intestinal discomfort than give up peanut butter. Give me peanut butter or give me ... no, just give me peanut butter.
Matt Platte says Husker Fever January 22, 2009 at 11:50am
The cure is, apparently, to paint your skin red, wear red clothes, jump and holler like a maniac for a few hours then hang out in a downtown parking lot eating hot dogs and drinking beer.
Gene says Have you tried more cowbell? January 22, 2009 at 12:03pm
Have you tried more cowbell?
meatball says I thought there would be January 22, 2009 at 12:42pm
I thought there would be no more sickness once Obama took office. Darn!
Dave K says RE: I thought there would be January 22, 2009 at 2:21pm
We have Him to thank for this beautiful weather though!
Gene says RE: I thought there would be January 22, 2009 at 3:26pm
HA!
JT says Probably either dropsy or something January 22, 2009 at 11:17pm
Probably either dropsy or something you might die of on the Oregon Trail.
Get Well Soon
Fletch says Maybe it's scurvy. January 23, 2009 at 8:45am
Maybe it’s scurvy.