Cop Catches Perp by Leaning in His General Direction

April 29, 2008 at 1:45pm By: Mr. Wilson Posted in The Lincolnite Blog

That’ll be the headline after LPD puts a few Segways on the streets of Lincoln. Remember Segways? They’re the two-wheeled, gyroscopically balanced doodads that were supposed to change the world. Yeah, that didn’t really happen.

LPD’s Segways are part of a push to both improve service and give the folks in blue a touch of green. If the Segways replace cars, then yeah, they might be a bit greener. But if they’re replacing foot or bike patrols—which is what a Segway would seem most useful for—they’re more wasteful, not less.

Personally, I think we should give cops those shoes with the retractable wheels. That would give officers three speeds: walk, run, and roller derby. The shoes could even have little red lights and sirens. Admit it, you would love to see a bad guy running down the sidewalk with a cop skating in hot pursuit. And the body check into a parked car to end the chase? Priceless.

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The Comments

D.M.B. April 29, 2008 at 5:18pm

How funny would our police friend look on a Segway Mr. Wilson?

Andrew April 29, 2008 at 6:42pm

waste of money. bikes would a much better tool than segways. any politician who supports this is an idiot.

Mr. Wilson April 29, 2008 at 7:07pm

I would pay good money to see him tooling around on his Segway, all decked out in a helmet and elbow and knee pads.

Rip April 29, 2008 at 8:31pm

You will never see me on one of these!!!

CS April 29, 2008 at 8:35pm

Police bikes are awesome. Ive looked all over for a decommisioned one. Better cranks, disc brakes, stronger frames-really nice packages set up, but you cant always buy one as a civvie. The segeway is a neat idea, unfortunately for Kamen I think he was about 20 years too early. Unless they are outfitted with cool police stuff {....you have 15 seconds to comply….14…..13…....12…...11…..).

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