Another Nauseating Mexican Food Experience in Lincoln

March 27, 2005 at 10:20pm By: Mr. T Posted in 625 Elm Street

I was hungry as hell for some good, fast Mexican food today. I was also running a bit late as I found it hard to find a hardware store open today (Easter) because I needed to buy some things for my vacuum. First, I drove past the new De Leon’s on 27th street, dissapointed to find that it still hadn’t opened yet (although it did seem close to being on the verge of final remodeling). After finally going to an Ace Hardware up on vine and 48th that was open and purchasing what I needed to get, I turned back south and headed for chipotle, which is usually open on Sundays, only to find it closed due to the holiday. There were also several other people milling about outside, dissapointed and a bit surprised it was closed.

Knowing that Oso is closed on Sunday, I headed south on 13th, thinking that Taco John’s was probably open. Taco John’s is pretty crappy, but Taco John’s also has super hot salsa verde available on request only (a discovery I made in Iowa), and with enough of that stuff on, their horrible tacos are actually suitable for human consumption. I drove into the driveway at the Taco John’s on south street, to find a policeman standing at the door asking me if I worked there! I said no, and he remarked that it was closed, but someone had left the door open. In anycase, I quickly left TJ’s and headed south on 9th directly for Taco Inn, the nearest Mexican place I knew of. I was really late already and very irritable because I was missing basketball. Within minutes I came to the Inn, only to find that it, too, was closed.

OK, as a last resort, I knew there was an Amigos on Nebraska Highway and Pioneers another moment down the road. Yes I was truly desperate. I swung in, to find it open. Although I was really late and could have brought it home with me, I decided to eat i

t quickly there so I could make use of the salsa bar and cheese and eat my meal while it was hot and pour a ton of condiments on it to make the food edible. I ordered the “combo burrito” and “crispy pinto burrito” and used a lot of cheese sauce, pico, and a salsa with a sign on it saying something like “limited time only fire-cooked salsa” or something like that. Both burritos were stomach churning. The combo burrito tasted like it was made from rat meat. The so-called “fire-cooked” salsa (“fire” connoting a message that it was supposed to be spicy) was about as hot as ketchup. I could not finish either the combo burrito or the pinto burrito, even though I was hungry as hell. Ironically, this particular Amigos faces a prison across the road, where I could watch inmates from afar exercising in the yard (what a wonderful view to complement your equally wonderful food…not). It made me wonder whether the food I was eating was any better than the grub served at the prison.

Most shocking of the entire experience was that there were several people, including couples and families, who were also at Amigos and apparently seemed as if they were actually enjoying their meals! This included one family, who I could tell from their dress had obviously just come back from Easter service. WTF?! Why in God’s name would a family celebrating a religious holiday spoil their day with a meal at Amigos?!?! That’s like having Christmas dinner at a Runza (another horrible Nebraska chain).

Lincoln truly dissapoints me. Not only have Lincolnites, collectively, allowed the cancer called Amigos actually spread as a franchise, but they keep this tumor alive by continuing to frequent this hellish establishment because they apparently like the “food” it serves. And some twisted and perverted souls like it so much that they bring the family there on holiday weekends!

I am counting the days until De Leon’s opens its 27th street branch. Please….let it be soon.

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Mr. Wilson March 28, 2005 at 5:43am

Methinks 10% of the problem is the food, and 90% of the problem is in your head. Clearly Amigos food isn’t that bad, or else the chain wouldn’t have become so successful. Ditto with Runza. Not that I’m saying you’re necessarily wrong about either restaurant—the quality of food at both Amigos and Runza has declined over the years. And Lincolnites’ tastes aren’t the most refined in the world. Still, your expectations seem a bit high. I mean, you willingly ate at a joint that sells donuts, hamburgers, root beer floats, and tacos. If that’s not the equivalent of a flashing CAUTION sign, I don’t know what is.

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