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Rob Blogging
Robert had a great first week at home. He had a doctor’s appointment on Wednesday at which we found out he has grown to 9lbs 14oz and 23 inches at six weeks old. He eats like a horse and he belches like his dad. He shows better and better head control every day, and he loves to talk to anybody who will talk back. These days I’m working with him on three things: grabbing and holding onto objects; following objects with his eyes; and pushing himself up with his arms when he is on his stomach. He is making slow but steady progress on all three.
Just for fun, here’s another video I shot while we were in the hotel in Boston:
The in-laws are headed to town this weekend for their first visit with Robert, and my mom and sister are throwing a shower on Sunday. That means I will probably only get to hold my kid during 3:00 a.m. feedings. I’ll probably also have to cut back on the cuteness. I can play the role of funny daddy when just The Missus and Daisy are around to witness it, but no way am I doing my (awful) Kermit The Frog impression in front of the in-laws. On second thought, I say that now, but kids have a way of getting you to behave in ways you never would have expected.
Strangers are Stranger Around Babies
What is it about babies that makes strangers act so, well, strange? I have been a dad for two weeks now, and in those two weeks I have witnessed some downright bizarre behavior. The most obnoxious, by far, is touching. Strangers think they can touch your baby so long as they sufficiently fawn over the child while they are doing it. People walk right up to you, say something pithy like “Ohh! How cute!” And then they proceed to caress and finger your kid like he’s a hamster in a petting zoo. It doesn’t even matter if he is sleeping. My internal reaction in this daily scenario is to scream, “What the hell? Get your filthy paws off my son!” Unfortunately, I’m far too reserved to actually say that out loud. Instead I opt for more subtle solutions, like maneuvering my baby to a difficult-to-reach position, or conjuring up some excuse for why I suddenly need to go “over there” as quickly as possible.
I think pretty much every parent is saying, “Yup, Mr. Wilson, been there, done that.” And every parent hates it. (The kids, once they are old enough to know a random freak from a family member, aren’t too fond of it, either.) So why does the behavior continue? Who are these bozos who think they can just go up to anybody’s baby and feel it up?
Babies aren’t the only ones who get drive-by-snuggled. New mothers have to put up with it, too. The Missus survived an unsolicited bear hug in the Chicago airport from an anonymous well-wisher that was so friendly, I swear the woman copped a feel. I’m sure The Missus would have issued a resounding WTF had she not been so caught off-guard.
I think I should try an approach with a little more passive-aggressiveness to it, rather than the straight passivity I’ve been using. Some lines I might try:
- “He ain’t a melon, lady, there’s no need to squeeze him.”
- “Five bucks per fondle, please.”
- “If I were to invade your personal space like that, I’d get 3-5 years and a black eye from your husband.”
- “Your parents weren’t the type to emphasize manners, were they?”
- “Do you always behave this way around sleeping little boys?”
Got any better lines, or good anecdotes of your own? Please share.
The Kid is Here…Any Questions?
Robert has been with us for over two weeks now, but I haven’t been doing a very good job of blogging about the adoption process like I intended to do. I do still plan to write on several topics, but I wonder what topics you want me to write about. Some of my planned topics include: where to start if you want to adopt; what to say and what not to say to your friend or family member who plans to adopt (or has adopted); and the bizarre ways strangers act around babies. What would you like to hear about?
We’re Home!
...and we’re exhausted! It was a long, long trip, but it was worth it. Think Robbie will let us sleep through the night tonight?
Yeah, I don’t think so either.
Introductions
Plane tickets to Boston: Free (thanks to my dad’s frequent flier miles!)
Staying in Boston for two weeks or so: a couple grand
Meeting your son for the first time:
Priceless.
Preparations
What does it take to prepare for the arrival of a new family member? A whole heckuva lot.
The Missus and I have kept busy over the past week trying to get ready. The Missus in particular has been doing a lot of the work since she is home every day. She has been on the phone more this week than she has in the past year.
The travel arrangements have been particularly tough. How do you plan for a trip with no end? Right now we are set up to stay in Boston for eleven days. Ugh, but there isn’t much we can do about it. We just have to sit back and let Massachusetts and Nebraska do their thing with each other. Hopefully they’ve heard of e-mail, or at least FedEx. Lord help us if they communicate via USPS. (Case in point, The Missus received a package from her mother yesterday that had been sent Priority Mail. How much more quickly did it arrive than a normal package would have? Zero days. And it was two days later than the lady at the Post Office in Albuquerque promised.) A huge thanks to my dad, by the way, who donated enough frequent flier miles that our flights will cost exactly $20. You can’t beat that with a stick.
I just realized I haven’t told you our son’s name. We are calling him Robert Solomon. Robert is a family name from both sides; Solomon is the name his birth mother chose. We aren’t under any obligation to use Solomon—especially since the birth mother wants a closed adoption—but we like it, and we had decided a while ago that we would try to take the birth mother’s wishes into account when naming our child. It’s tough to say right now since we haven’t even met him, but he will probably go by Robert and Robbie. I have a hunch “Poopmaster” might also sneak in there a time or two.
Daisy has finally relaxed a bit now that the flow of new baby gear has slowed. There for a while I think she was getting overwhelmed. She’s still mad that we screwed up “her” room, though. Now she can’t hide from the vacuum in there any more.
We leave on Monday and we “officially” become parents on Tuesday. Then we’ll have to live in a hotel until Massachusetts says we can leave. If anybody has any connections in HHS in either Massachusetts or Nebraska, feel free to help speed things along. I’ll even buy you a burrito at Oso. I’ll be blogging throughout the trip—and working on the new version of Lincolnite, by the way—so keep checking in here. Expect the first photos (and videos?) Tuesday evening.
Boston Will Have to Wait
Oops, I guess we aren’t headed to Boston tomorrow after all. Now we’re shooting for Friday or Sunday. Every trip needs one hiccup. That counts as ours, right?
The Missus and I are awfully excited right now. I know The Missus wants to go to Boston right now, paperwork and process be damned. That means I get to play the role of responsible spoil sport who annoyingly points out things like our bank account balance. Being the responsible one is just no fun at all, but one of us has to do it.
And Daisy? Well, she knows something is up, but I don’t think she has any idea just how big that “something” is.
A Lincolnite Awaits in Boston
The Missus and I will be traveling to Boston on Wednesday
Friday or Sunday. Many of you may know why.
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